Jan 14 2012

5 Reasons I Think Google Is Broken

1) Google Plus (Google+) – Cultural Toilet & Massive Waste of Time
Google Plus
2) Self-Important Leadership – Marissa Mayer, Oprah wannabe. Martha Stewart? Really?

marissa mayer

3) Google Maps Doesn’t Work.  It can’t even find the San Francisco International Airport (SFO). How much lamer could it be?
Google Maps Sucks

4) Search Engine Results Pages (SERPS) filled with broken SERP-hogging features. The theater website, where actual movie times could be accessed is pushed nearly below the fold. All links to showtimes in Google’s feature are broken and useless. Link to the theater points to show times on the wrong continent.

Google serp-hogging features dont work

Google serp-hogging features dont work

Google is Lame

5) Google search doesn’t work anymore. Their push towards popular SERPS and assuming you are misspelling everything leads to useless results, the need to search multiple times and put quotes around everything.  At least Yahoo gives you a link to click that indicates that there is the possibility that you aren’t an idiot and actually want results for the terms you typed in.

google sucks

yahoo is better than google

 

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Sep 16 2011

Delicious.com Not So Delicious Anymore (for Link Builders)

UPDATE: As of October 2011 there is a new Delicious in town. The new version does not appear to have an RSS Feed, but more information on its SEO potential to come. Check back, or subscribe to our feed…

Delicious.com (formerly del.icio.us) is a social bookmarking site that was one of the first of its kind. It allows  you to save web links, along with tags, a title and description, to your personal bookmarks page. This bookmarks page is public.

The value of social bookmarking sites for Search Engine Optimization (SEO) is that you can place links to your own websites on  your bookmark page, and they will show up as backlinks to the search engines, giving you the all-important link authority that search engines use to rank their results.

The problem with this scenario is that for links to be counted as backlinks, the page they appear on needs to be indexed by the search engine in question. And as of this writing, I see NO delicious.com user bookmark pages appearing in the Google index. Nor do I see any of the tag pages, which contain lists of links based on bookmark tags, in the Google index.

What I do see is that 123 bookmarks have been created in the last minute. I just hope it’s not for SEO link-building, because it’s not going to work!

 

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Jul 24 2011

Google Engage Sign-up Problems

Google Engage is a new program aimed at SEO professionals that offers tools and training to help them better run their clients Adwords programs. Amongst their stated weaponry are such diverse elements as:

  • Free $100 Adwords coupons for new accounts
  • Training to sharpen up your Adwords chops
  • Materials to help you market your Adwords services

I can understand the need Google sees for such a service. The degree of difficulty and time required to run a successful Adwords campaign has greatly increased in the last few years.

Some of the requirements for becoming part of Google Engage are:

  • You must be a web professionals such as a webmaster, search engine marketer/optimizer, or marketing consultant who wants to help their clients with AdWords.
  • You must be able to answer your phone.

Well, I have both of those requirements down cold, so I signed up. The confirmation warned me to wait for a confirmation call from an 800 number, because I would need to complete the phone verification to participate in the program.

A few days later I received a call, and my caller id showed a toll free number (1-800-848-9251).  I usually screen these numbers because they are almost always from telemarketers. Google told me to be waiting for this call though, so I picked it up. No one was on the other end. “Hello. Hello. Hello” was my greeting, but it was answered by silence.

A few minutes later I received the following email:

 

About your application to Google Engage for Agencies

Hello,

Thank you for your interest in the Google Engage program. Your application unfortunately does not qualify for this program. This program is specifically for web professionals such as webmasters, search engine marketers/optimizers, and marketing consultants who want to help their clients with AdWords.

If you would like free help in setting up an AdWords account, you can call 1-877-509-4292.

If you are interested in learning more about AdWords, please visit these resources:

AdWords Online Classroom

Help center

AdWords blog

Small business center

Best,

Google Engage for Agencies team

I immediately called the phone number listed on the email and spoke to a living human being, something I am unaccustomed to when dealing with Google. He confirmed my eligibility for the program and said he would talk to the team and someone would take care of the problem.

About an hour later I received exactly the same rejection letter again. Whooot!

I searched for the Google 800 number that gave me the silent treatment, and turns out 1) it’s an Adwords number, and 2) other people get the same treatment:

http://800notes.com/Phone.aspx/1-800-848-9251

Here’s to hoping Google gets their phone verification act together. Google Engage looks to be a worthwhile program. I’d like to find out.

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May 19 2011

Thieving Google Bastards!

Back in the day I had a blog hosted on Blogspot.com. At some point I decided to put it on it’s own domain, and used the automated Blogger process that registered my domain name of choice with Enom. Less than a year later I transferred the domain to Godaddy, so it would be with all of my other domain names in one easy to access place.

Even though the domain name was no longer registered with Enom, Google Checkout charged my credit card $10 to renew the domain when the registration date came around. Google stole my $10, and there is no way to contact them to GET MY MONEY BACK!!!

All I could think to do was post my issue on Google Forums, and guess what? There were many people complaining they were also charged by Google for domains that were no longer registered with Enom. And guess what else? Google has exactly ZERO replies to any of the inquiries. Google’s implied position: THANKS FOR THE FREE MONEY BITCH!!!

http://www.google.com/support/forum/p/Google%20Apps/thread?tid=087388b75155b58f&hl=en
http://www.google.ru/support/forum/p/Google+Apps/thread?tid=05503e2483bd3f20&hl=en
http://www.google.com/support/forum/p/Google+Apps/thread?tid=791088bd58ad72ed&hl=en

You may notice if you browse Google forums that you will seldom find a question addressed or answered by a Google employee. If you do get an answer (rather than a piling on of “me too” posts) it will likely be by some idiot that knows less than you, but still manages not to answer your question with a condescending attitude.

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Aug 20 2009

Tip: These results do not include the word

Google has a new “feature” or ”function” or “f*ck you,” depending on your mindset. When searching using a multiple word term, sometimes the results will be delivered with one of the terms left out. You are informed of this by a “Tip” at the bottom of the results page that says “These results do not include the word (your word here) …”

Example:

1. “Let me type these three words in, and Google will serve the results I am looking for.”

 

 

 

2. “So far so good! Look how many hits I have for my three search words that I typed in and which are conveniently listed for me by my friends at Google”

 

 

3. “WTF!?! No wonder this S.E.R.P. was C.R.A.P. Google left out the middle search term, and informed me with a small “Tip” at the BOTTOM of the SERP, which contradicts the “Results” statement at the TOP of the SERP.”

 

Yes, the “Tip: These results do not include the word ” thing is a travesty. Is Google going the way of Microsoft with their “Vista” and their “Bing?” Or is there a something else going on here. Let me know what you think.

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